Story - Another day in the life of Horace Bunce

Post date: Sep 26, 2019 3:7:17 PM

By Acorne Oakley

Tonight I have another tale of the cousin of Second Shirriff Bodo Bunce..

y'all remember Horace Bunce, dont you?

This tale be about......

another day in the life of Horace Bunce!

Horace was careful not to make a sound..

As quiet as could be, he followed the row of bushes to where he could overhear the goblins.

the short ugly one waved his sword in the air and exclaimed,

"WE will teach them orcs a thing or two...

when we invade the Shire tomorrow!"

the slightly taller....but still as ugly... one answered,

"who cares about them orcs? I'm looking forward to having hobbit slaves to do my cooking..

Especially that one who lives on the edge of our lost lands in the north of the Shire..

Aaaahh the sweet smell of burned turnips coming from her burrow...

cant wait! "

"Go on out and kill us a bear for supper while I start a fire!"

the shorter one picked up his bow and left grumbling

Soon he came back with only a small coney

the taller goblin smirked and said,

"kind of a small bear you got there"

The shorter one dropped the coney near the fire and shot an angry glance sideways

He just knew that he hadnt heard the last of the complaining about his poor hunting skills

After they finished the meal...

which didnt take them long since it was a mighty puny coney

The shorter one pulled out a bottle of ale ...

which he said he had stolen from a ranger...

and called for a toast to taking over the Shire on the morrow

they both laughed heartily and gulped down the ale which they passed between them

"What was that !?!"

"sounds like drumming coming out of them bushes!"

They both turned to the bush where Horace was hiding

He knew all too well ...that were no drum...

Just his heart beating wildly

And it just got louder when the two goblins got up and started in his direction....

It seemed like they were both gonna jump thru the bush on him ...all at once!

Horace closed his eyes and felt something heavy fall on top of him...

He woke with a start to hear his mum shouting,

" Horace! Are you sleeping behind that haystack again!?!"

Relieved Horace laughed out loud realizing that not two goblins at all...

but the haystack had just fallen over on him